October 10, 2011

Raining

It's already the start of the third week of school and I'm still not getting back into rhythm, it feels so strange. I still feel so behind in terms of school and for some reason life experiences. I am in dire need of living and getting away. I'm pushing myself to be more driven in school and mentally I'm all for it, but physically it's not working out so well. I don't know if it's laziness, the fact that I sleep less than 5 hours every night or working on the weekends with difficult customers that's got to me.

I keep catching myself wanting to do more, even though I feel like I'm busy enough ... I honestly don't think I am. This constant need to do bigger and better things is not helping me sleep at night, might I add. There's so many goals and aspirations I wish to reach, but at this point it all seems so distant. With this being said, I still feel so behind being at the age I am and I wish I could've done more in my life than I have so far.

My life right now seems really strange, it almost feels unreal like I've lost touch with reality for a while and reality is starting to come down on me like bricks.

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